From the author of the bestselling classics We're Just Like You, Only Prettier, and Bless Your Heart, Tramp, comes a collection of essays so funny, you'll shoot co'cola out of your nose. Topics include such gems as: - Why Miss North Carolina is too nice to hate - How Gwyneth Paltrow wants to improve your pathetic life - Strapped for cash? Try cat whispering - Sex every night for a year? How do you wrap that? - Get yer Wassail on: It's carolin' time - Airlines serving up one hot mess - Action figure Jesus - Why Clay Aiken ain't marrying your glandular daughter - And much more! Complete with a treasure trove of Celia's genuine southern recipes, You Can't Drink All Day if You Don't Start in the Morning is sure to appeal to anyone who lives south of something.